Updated: Jul 14, 2021
I’ve been on this seemingly never-ending quest of personal transformation for a long time now. However, I’ve recently come to a big realization: I haven't been transforming anything. Changing things here and there, yes. But I would find myself spinning in the same circles, wrapped up with the same issues, and starting all over again.
Does this sound familiar?
While reading self-help books and searching for new solutions through holistic practices has definitely been life-changing, real transformation didn’t begin to happen for me until this past year. And honestly, it hasn’t been all that fun – but extremely necessary in actually living life and fulfilling my personal purpose.
What Does Transformation Mean?
Transformation means taking control of your life. It means recognizing where you’re being passive, taking the right actions to show up for change, and essentially living your most authentic life. And while the results are extremely liberating, the process can be - likely, will be - painful.
Ultimately, you’re detoxifying any energy that isn’t serving you. During your personal transformation, you’ll find that you may not have as much, or anything, in common with people you were once good friends with. You may find that your job, which you could once show up for on autopilot, suddenly feels so wrong.
When you start looking at the areas of your life where you’ve been passive, or just letting life happen to you, you can begin to create the life you thought was maybe out of your reach. And here’s the most amazing part: when you recognize what’s not right for you, the universe will bring you what is right, in the form of career opportunities, relationships, new ideas, etc.
The Transformation Process
Your current reality is the result of a story you made up as a child. Perhaps this story was, “I’m unworthy,” “I’m stupid,” “I’m unloved,” and so on. This story came out of a specific event that occurred, in which your little kid brain attached false meaning to, and you’ve been seeing the world through this lens every day since.
We live through these stories in our adult lives, and essentially are surviving instead of actually living. Transformation occurs when you can get to the root of your story, so that you can then get out of your own way and start living out your purpose.
Here are a few suggestions in beginning your transformation journey. And trust me when I say, to develop habits that change your life, it will take more than reading a few self-help books (which are amazing, by all means – keep reading them. Just do more.).
1. Take a personal transformation course. I had heard of these types of events for years, but I couldn’t get behind the concept of being at a big lovefest for 3 days. Guess what? It was the best thing I’ve ever done, and it’s changed my perspective on life in ways I didn’t think were possible.
2. Get a life coach. This was another decision I was a little skeptical about making, but did it anyway. While my coach was intended to help me build my business, she really doubled as a life coach in helping me to recognizing the blocks that were stopping me from success.
3. See a therapist. While many people say therapy isn’t for them, I believe that it certainly helps when looking for the root of your problems. Methods such as EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique, or tapping) or CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) are highly effective under the guidance of a trained therapist.
3. Meditate. If you listen to anything here, make it this one. Meditation as a daily practice will lower your stress levels, clearing space for creativity and ultimately improving each area of your life. It will allow you to focus more on what’s important, increasing your productivity and gaining faster results - just by sitting in silence for a few minutes every day.
My personal transformation process has brought up everything I’ve ever pushed down: financial turmoil, inauthentic friendships, childhood memories, you get the picture. But it is so freeing, and worth every minute, as I’m able to see what’s been in my way and live my best life every day.